Visions of You

I can’t write in this state when my heart and soul is full of nostalgia. I dreamt you out of my 2 favourite animated movies.

Now you’re big as life, breathing, moving, living right before my eyes.

Everytime I see your face, I can’t believe my luck, but this is reality.

I am no longer sad, only carrying remnants of deep love that I have learned from the past.

Liebling, ich liebe dich.

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let go & take action

Clickbaits, different energies, different seasons – sometimes you just gotta stop listening to what other people are saying – stop making people make you believe that you should think a certain way, enough with the self improvement talks

Take action bbys

Change of. Heart

True change comes from the heart.

My chakras light up in an intense way that’s not painful, but slightly triggering – and reminding me about the person that I wish to become in or without your presence

The mind hurts a little because it cannot understand, but it carries the emotion it feels, only ever with a slight tinge of pain, and now the ego is willing to be guided by the heart.

 

Gotta Go

I gotta go. these past memories no longer have a hold on me and i am frankly relieved, however i just need to say that it will be a fond place in my heart, a place where i have learnt a lot of lessons, emotions, following the heart has really helped me grow into a better person.

We all have learnt to love and lose somebody, a part of ourselves that will quite frankly never be the same from this point on.

So I gotta go, I gotta go.


 

Surrender

Layers of self deception, resisting, running from the truth – not soft enough to face the truth…

Soul, just let me do this once and for all. I want to surrender everything.

Finding you in book cases, mazes full of twist and turns perceived by my mind, trying to find that song. Olafur Arnalds, it was something about that, calling me your princess, seeing your handsome face once more –

It was only a dream but it felt so real, and in the dream I did not even know whether you were science or fiction

Did I put you again in the waiting room?

This is the final chapter Megan

 

Deep

I don’t know how else to feel but deep and I feel that one day a dam might just overflow and living my own life is the best thing that I have ever done.

A part of me understands now what it’s like to truly have your own life and not wait for somebody to come rescue you, waiting is a form of self destruction sometimes. Sometimes, you’ll have to take into account the actions you choose to take or not to take.

Maybe, in the end it’s just me who’s really feeling things deeply, or I cannot figure out who’s feeling what and what and so and so anymore.

Just so you know, ich liebe dich, S.

I keep running into different people only to find you. You’re everywhere and everything else. Denying myself the pleasures of loving somebody like you is a stupid thing to do and I should never do that again.

Energetically

Energetically cutting cords with someone who made you lose a part of yourself, who reinvented your psyche, who made you a mini version of them – that form of intrusion is almost albeit unacceptable but thank the Gods for astrology and understanding some forms of psychic imprint in a person —

Dear God I ask for strength to finally breakthrough and have it all come full circle. It can happen now.

I feel really hot and fiery inside, imploding, fiery pits of dragon hell within the subconscious – so violent, controllable but strong – what is this? Serpent? Kundalini?

What is cutting cords? Burning bridges what is it that I have to do?