Heart of Gold

Taking advantage of people’s hearts of gold, and the ones who truly care and want it and need it most actually don’t get it, but get pushed out into the cold to survive by themselves, having a sense of bitterness in oneself in the long run or hope – only to be dashed by scammers alike.

What has our world come to? Liars, deceptive manipulators.

Where are the genuine people? They have to be out there somehow.

Never trust the internet (most of the time).


Breathing finally

There are some things I have to remember. Parallels, lessons. Daniel. You incepted in my mind these convoluted views of sexuality, you were so smart, but so bloody troubled, and you couldn’t take responsibility for it. I choose to not accept your beliefs, as I have mine. You can’t pull me down there anymore, you don’t have the power. I choose to explore my sexuality in my own way. Indeed you’ve opened my pandora box but I choose to look past it, and not let my Leo my ego my sexuality fully define me. I am love, unconditional love, and I’m not about to impose your version on hell onto the person I love deeply – S. I see the way he loves me, his own version of hell not conflicted onto me, and for me to want that version of hell to be known – maybe not this time around. Till then, your version of hell holds no power over anybody else’s minds. I apologize to myself for being naive, allowing you to intrude my subconscious and plant insidious ideas to cause my psyche nothing but pain. I know you’ll be around, but just a hovering thought. Maybe to keep me safe in any situation, I appreciate it, but I am strong enough to be my own person and trust my instincts. Chiron in virgo and 5th house to be healed, always perfect and deserving of love without having to overtly prove oneself’s worth/effort in 5th. Moving to phase 4 in love. We choose love. Goodnight.

I Hope You Know

Love, sorry for pushing you away, trying to constantly reform myself through multiple perspectives because I can’t stand not having a fixed sense of self. But you were right, the real form of self is fluid, not rigid, and if my responses have hurt you in anyway, please forgive me. My old patterns were being showed to me and for it to be resolved and purged from the unconscious once and for all for proper ascension with you. My constant back and forth push and pull energies might have left you feeling drained, but just so you know – I see honor in your actions, patience and respect. I cannot ask for anything more.

I will wait for you this time, defenseless.


Uphill Battle

Whether it matters or not, some dreams wake you up from the rosy lens you’ve been using this entire time, stuck in a never endless time loop where you can’t seem to get out from it. Truth is, you can, but it’s going to be an uphill battle.

Battles, choose them wisely, and adjust yourself with time. I am writing this to myself, not to anyone, because I know more than anyone else my limits and my own darkness which I let occupy me for longer than it should, and it shouldn’t anymore.

Just when you start the battle, there will be a lot of obstacles, but there are people who love you as well. Win fair, play fair, be consistent, be humble, persistence is key.

SHe Needs

Notice how in the “she” there’s a “he”? Yes, we all have a masculine side within ourselves and to deny that will create an imbalance.

“She needs love” “She needs equality” – do you see that the embodiment of women is to empower all beings? Not just her female companions, but also male counterparts as well. That’s what mother nature does, brings back everyone to her womb, only to nurture and heal them once more.

So this divide of feminism and men-ism is not speaking about unity, but about separation and power struggles which for centuries has plagued every single mindset in our human brains.

We keep wanting equality but by shunning our other counterpart, what does that really mean? Still essentially rejecting our own parts, and that’s why we cannot come full circle.

To all neo-feminists out there, think of it. Anger will no longer prevail because it causes nothing but strife. That masculine side of ourselves is to empower us to be able to give life, give love to us first, and then extending that 10fold to the people around you.

Thank you Anne Hathaway for bringing this up.